Begin whining...

When I write, I really want to write about positive things, so I hold off because things have been TOUGH lately.  I have a job where I am paid very well, have a ton of freedom and flexibility, and never have a dull moment.  That said, all of that comes with a tremendous amount of responsibility.  Others have expectations of me that sometimes can be hard to meet.  I am responsible for a lot of decisions and planning and execution and that kind of pressure can be crushing at times.

This is one of those times.

For the last 2 months, I've been being me AND covering for one of my supervisors.  I've been dealing with staffing shortages, procedure changes requiring a lot of extra work by the staff I'm supervising and an overwhelming feeling of "I can't freaking do this!".  As much as I hate to admit it, I've even CRIED.  Ugh, I hate that.

Everyone has drama at work.  Everyone has tough times.  I know I'm not unique or special, but man, it feels like I am right now.  My husband has been dealing with staffing issues, too.  He's has been stressed.  But, the truth is, he has no effing clue what stress at work really is.  He just doesn't.  I love him, I do, but he doesn't not have clue one about being the one person in a company of 160 employees who holds responsibility for executing a great deal of assignments and making decisions for way too many people.  In fact, the truth is I don't know anyone else who has this kind of responsibility so maybe part of the problem is that I don't have any peers that I can commiserate with or bounce problems off of, etc.  And, there is NO worries from anyone above me about my not meeting a deadline.  I must.  Period.

It's really kicked my ass and I guess I just need to vent.  I know that in six months, things should be a little smoother in my world, but until that happens, I'm getting gray hair!  

/whining